Live without you
by Miss Momolo
Summary: "Get out!" She screamed her voice sore at the end, he flinched. "But-" he said though he was interrupted and though he didn't know what he started to protest for. A/N: This is a ONE-SHOT! that ended in a short lengh story Please comment and review. Chapter 5 is up The last chapter
1. Live without you

**Live without you**

Sasuke had been fallowing her for a while now. Since this morning, until she'd woken up and in these instants as she walked about the village as from everywhere everyone worried about small details for the upcoming storm. It was interesting how she seemed to be the only one calmly marching, almost as if no one told her what was happening. He liked it.

She glanced back and his heart stopped. It was almost as if she had seen him from afar. Except she hadn't. She turned her head to her steps. He wished she'd seen him.

His stomach tied in knots just thinking about tonight. If she would talk to him tonight.

_Oh, my stomach's tied in knots_

_I'm afraid of what I'll find if you want to talk tonight_

_Oooo Oooo_

_See the problem isn't you, it's me I know_

_I can tell, I've seen it time after time_

_And I'll push you away_

_I get so afraid, oh no_

Everyone was gone. The skies darken to the color of tempest and the wind roared the form. He stood outside her window. She had pulled the covers around her shoulders. She was cold and he shivered.

He had left everyone behind today. Karin, Suigetsu and Juugo, he didn't feel like staring at their faces today. Rather, the feeling of being suffocated was no longer bearable and there was something hallowed that echoed with something. He didn't know what it was. He planned on answering it tonight. He just wished that Naruto didn't turn at her doorstep trying to take refuge in her house because he just didn't want to be alone in this downpour.

Sasuke didn't want to be alone.

She turned around and looked at her window. Luckily Sasuke moved in time. He breathed as his stomach contradicted with itself. She was the answer.

_Oh, my stomach's tied in knots_

_I'm afraid of what I'll find if I can see you with him tonight_

_Oooo oooo_

_See problem isn't you, it's me I know_

_I do this every single time_

_I'll push you away, ohh _

_I get so afraid, oh no_

The rain started shortly after and he thought it was ironic. She was ironic. And he gritted his teeth and kicked himself for letting it get to him. He knew that this was wrong, since he entered her room this morning. It was a mistake. He should have left. He should have left. He has to leave.

He entered her room before the rain caught him.

He still had time to go away before she noticed he was there. Before he himself knew he was there. He could make this right. This was wrong. He could make this right. This was wrong.

He could push away. He couldn't push closer. He couldn't bare the humiliation that this could bring. What if she saw him there? He couldn't bare the shame that this could bring.

What if she never saw him there? He couldn't bare the indignity that this could bring.

He pushed himself to sit beside her.

She kept pulling the covers tangled around her body as raindrops hit the window pane. She was cold and he shivered.

He picked the silk covers and brought it to her. For a second she seemed to relax. For a second one of his fingers touched her shoulder. It was more silky then the covers.

His stomach tied in knots. It wasn't the fact that the pain subsided and increased at some same level, it wasn't the desire to join her there, it wasn't the regret. Her eyes were open. This time she was looking at him.

Her eyes were piercing and he shivered.

"Sasuke?" he felt his heart sink with the bitterness she used to say it and with the hurt that she pronounced it.

"Sakura." He hated how his voice was anticipated and soft.

She stared not blinking at him, her eyes and ocean of green grass. Expect grass wasn't that color. And it wasn't as closely pretty.

It seemed to take her a few moments to realize what was happening as her eyes grew, fogging with the realization, scrambling away from the covers. She started to move to one corner, wrapping her arms around her legs as she hid her face with her hands. She began to rapidly take air as if she was gasping.

He left like he couldn't breathe.

Sasuke didn't know whether to stay there and let herself calm down. This was his time to back out. This was his time to run. Leave and never remember this day. He could push away.

He pushed his feet to where she was.

She started to shook. As if by instinct she let one finger drop and she saw him.

"Get out!" She screamed her voice sore at the end, he flinched.

"But-" he said though he was interrupted and though he didn't know what he started to protest for.

"Leave me alone!" She sounded like an animal. The ache constricted. The knots tangled even further. He crossed his hands trying to hide as he gripped his abdomen. "Leave! Leave! Leave!"

He sat down again trying to ease the pain. "Why?" he whispered.

She had stopped screaming but she rocked herself back and forth. She ran her hands rapidly against her hair. "Because I'll kill you. I promise I will_, this_ time I will. Before you me."

She still hadn't. She most have known that too or she must have seen his face, he knows that he must have looked like a sentimental idiot. "Because leaving means no return. You can't be here." She paused, momentarily looking at her feet. When she looked back she seemed confuse. "Because I hate you."

That was it. He stood and walked to the only way out and the only way he should have gone from the start. When he stared beyond what seemed to be an endless abyss the knots tighten and couldn't help but glance at her one more time.

She beckoned her head to the outside and it was as though all her tantrum had gone and a cold exterior had appeared. He shivered.

"But- it's raining." It was a foolish excuse and he didn't know why he was doing this.

She looked troubled again. "Leave."

"And I'm afraid." As his words tumbled from his mouth and he knew that this was it. The truth.

Her face cracked. "I'm afraid." He repeated, the words becoming more real and more surreal. "I'm afraid because I left everyone to fallow you all day. For no reason. It's _stupid_ because you always did that and I always thought it was _stupid_. And it's _stupid_. _Stupid_ because I understand it now. _Stupid _because I understand that I can't live without you now."

At her look he started to stumble for words and he felt a pang of realization. All of this was ironic, in one point in his past she had done this and now with some twist of fate he was too. She was ironic.

"I… I can't even live with myself."

"Leave." Her words were like knife and he never tasted rejection like this. But her face was held higher than her words even if tears were streaming down her cheeks.

"I know," he kept on insisting even though it was over. "It's all my fault. I understand why you're trying to be against. I only have myself to blame but do you think we could-"

"Stop!" she shouted as she jumped out of her bed. She came to where he was and for a split second he was half expecting her to wrap her arms around him. Expect she opened the window. "Stop," she ordered weakly as she looked down at the floor, "just… leave."

The wind rattled with her hair as it tainted her with rain. When he didn't say anything she raised her watery eyes to him. He let the last words of his sentence slip "-start again…"

_And I can't live without you now_

_Oh-oh_

_I can't even live with myself_

_Oh-oh-oh_

_I can't live without you now_

_Oh-oh_

_And I don't want nobody else_

_Oh-oh-oh_

_I only have myself to blame_

_But do you think we can start again_

_I only have myself to blame_

_But do you think we can start again_

_I only have myself to blame_

_But do you think we can start again_

_I only have myself to blame_

_Let's start again_

_Let's start again_

_I can't live without you_

_Oh-oh oh-oh oh-oh_

_Oh-oh oh-oh oh-oh_

_Oh-oh oh-oh oh-oh_

_Oh-oh oh-oh oh-oh_

_And I can't live without you now_

_Oh-oh_

_I can't even live with myself_

_Oh-oh-oh_

_I can't live without you now_

_Oh-oh_

_And I don't want nobody else_

_Oh-oh-oh_

_'Cause I can't live without you now_

_Oh-oh_

_I can't even live with myself_

_Oh-oh_

_And I can't live without you now_

_Oh-oh_

_'Cause I don't want nobody else_

_Nobody else_

_Nobody else_

_I can't live without you_

_Oh_

The end

**A/N: I do not own Naruto or their characters. This is horrible I know, I know. But I want your opinions. So you suspected correct this is a song fic though I didn't want to tell that from the beginning because then I will spoil it. The song is 'Stomach tied in knots' though I think you might get it from how I over used the expression. Oh, from the band Sleeping with sirens. XD Also this is inspired by ISSAC the current storm that lamely hit Puerto Rico if canceling two days of school and work for rain is lame! I'm stalling, aren't I?  
Either way what do you guys think? Comment?**


	2. Get over you

**Get over you**

_I looked away_

_Then I look back at you_

_You try to say_

_The things that you can't undo_

_If I had my way_

_I'd never get over you_

_Today's the day_

_I pray that we make it through_

_Make it through the fall_

_Make it through it all_

Sakura stared at him expectantly as she whispered low, "Go."

He just glanced at her and it surprised her how he could do that without blinking. With that she didn't know what to do next. All her threats were lies and maybe he knew that and that was why he wasn't leaving. But it was like she was transported in to the past where she would peruse him everywhere and where she would have sleepless nights dreaming of how he would do the same. How he would need her as much as she had needed him. Now that it all laid in front of her she realized that maybe she didn't wanted that.

"No." his words made her pulse skip for one second.

Why was he making things more complicated? He always hated her. He never wanted her. He was annoyed by her. If he could he would have been alone every time they were together. And yet he was here asking for everything he convinced her he never wanted. If she wasn't so spiteful she might have thrown herself to him. At times, she remembered, that when her days were sour and even though he wouldn't talk to her, but just with one look, just one instant with their eyes locked she felt better. She would then imagine a finally with no end, his arms around her, her universe would file in order and she would be happy.

Why was he making things more complicated? "Why won't you go already?"

She realized she wanted more. She wanted everything.

_You're the only one,_

_I'd be with till the end_

_When I come undone_

_You bring me back again_

_Back under the stars_

_Back into your arms_

"Because you don't let me talk." He said with his nonchalant form, like he used to always be. She used to love it. She wondered what she ever found so amazing about it.

"So what?" she asked insulted by his lack of memory. "I never remember you ever listening to me when I talked." His eyes narrowed with some type of hurt. She tried to figure what hurt can it bring but she was too busy trying prove her point. "Like in this instant you're not listening to me when I tell you to leave."

"Why are you making this hard?"

"Me?" she asked more outraged than amuse by his claim. "You were the one who left. The one who started this in the first place. If you would have stayed. If you would have _listen_ to all of us. And about listening again?" her voice broke and she swallowed. "Didn't you heard when I begged you to stay or when… I told you I _loved_ you."

He opened his mouth but her voice was what came out as she continued. "Now you come here. Wanting for things to begging again. _Wanting_ me. Who do you think you are?"

"I'm-" She interrupted not wanting to hear it and just wanted to pour all those years of self-loathing. If this was it, she was going to make the best of it.

"_Yes. _That's a good one." She said more to herself pricing what she had accomplished. "_Who are you?"_

"I'm someone who wants to start things over. Because I recognized that I was wrong." He said unsure and for the first time she realized he was intimidated by her. Not the other way around. It felt almost refreshing if the rain wasn't hitting her face.

"This again." She crossed her arms, avoiding the anxiety that was building inside of her since he came. But as he kept insisting she found it harder to keep it together, from it falling apart. She had to be strong. So, she laughed bitterly. "What does that even mean?"

His eyebrows arched in hurt as his- starting to get wet- hair stuck to his forehead. She pressed. "You can't start something that you never began."

This time his head snapped to the outside, letting his face purposely get tangle with the rain. His chaw twitched. "I might not remember hearing all you'd said but I never remembered you being this cold."

She stared at him tears drowning up but she didn't start to cry because she didn't want him to see it. And still a voice in her head was screaming, willing him to turn and see her. Though she might as well pull a chair and sit all day because he wasn't. She didn't want to continue this conversation but she had one last thing to say before she made him go away for good.

"How can you say that?" she ignored how her voice cracked with sentiment, daring herself to break to pieces. "How can you act like you knew me when you know nothing about me?" when he turned his face fell noticing her appearance for the first time. "If you knew me you'd know that all I said was the opposite of what I meant. You'd know that I want you to leave before I turn to shreds. That I waited all my life for this and I can't figure out if it's real. That I pretend and try to convince myself that I hate you. Maybe I do." His eyes fell to the floor. "But I love you more." He lifted his eyes to her again, they were like daggers, stabbing her everywhere. "If you knew me… you'd know that this is your cue to go and never come back. But if you been really listening to me now and really, really knew me you'd know that I was telling you to do everything but."

As Sasuke pulled her into his arms she swore she saw stars.

_Wanna know who you are_

_Wanna know where to start_

_I wanna know what this means_

_Wanna know how you feel_

_Wanna know what is real_

_I wanna know everything, everything_

_And I don't wanna fall to pieces_

_I just want to sit and stare at you_

_I don't want to talk about it_

_And I don't want a conversation_

_I just want to cry in front of you_

_I don't want to talk about it_

_I'm in love with you_

_Cuz i'm in love with you_

_I'm in love with you_

_I'm in love with you_

**A/N: It's the second part and also a song fic. Song: Fall to pieces Artist: Avril Lavigne. So yeah, I did this to please **DaneyAB **and **cleareyes25 **! Whoever they are cuz I don't know them ( I would Like to know them though :D) ! Why? Because this is all peer pressure. Funny cuz in school I was never into peer pressure and now with reviews I am! What can I say? I don't like people stressing over my work with suspense that I didn't intend to continue!  
Please review! Especially DaneyAB and cleareyes25**

**P.S I like exclamation points!**


	3. Make sure

**Make sure **

Sakura was still awake. It wasn't as if she could fall to sleep, not when his arms locked her in her bed.

Nothing happened last night, they just decided in a mute agreement that they would rest in bed holding on to each other and it was awkward but it was more awkward if she broke from this. She wasn't so sure if _he_ was awake but the silence felt good. Good enough to think.

It wasn't as if they came to a concurrence for their previous argument but it was arranged somehow. And they just went with it. But deep in Sakura's heart she felt everything horribly wrong because she felt horribly empty. Despite her repeating that everything was okay over and over in her head, she knew that it wasn't. This moment couldn't erase those of him trying to kill her, him saying horrendous things, of him leaving when she confessed her love and that especially when he came back and pleaded for her. It was all wrong, she had acted upon past dreams because deep inside she always wondered how it would be, how it would feel like.

And it was not like she had hoped.

It wasn't under the circumstances she wanted.

She realized that maybe what you want isn't what you need.

The sun was filtering through her glass window. A day had just begun and she wanted to leave, to have some space to breathe.

Sakura causally twisted in such so she could see him. His eyes were close and he was gently taking in air. So, he was actually sleeping. She sighed.

In one quick move she broke away from his arms and left him.

_The sun is filling up the room_

_And I can hear you dreaming_

_Do you feel the way I do right now?_

_I wish we would just give up_

_Cause the best part is falling_

_Call it anything but love_

_And I will make sure to keep my distance_

_Say "I love you" when you're not listening_

_How long can we keep this up, up, up? _

The village was just starting to awake and she didn't even bother changing from her sleeping clothes. It didn't matter because in seconds she had reached the place where he had left her to pursue- what? She didn't care and she actually didn't want to know because that- even if it was in that moment- was more important than them. She knew it sounded childish because they were always nothing but just like him in that moment for her they were.

Sakura took a seat on the cement bench he had laid her so many years ago and rest her head as so as if she appeared to have been sleeping there all night.

She closed her eyes trying to reanimate the scene when she woke up to nothing but the echoing of his excuse. "Thank, you."

The only thing that didn't fit the mold was that she wasn't the same size as she use to, she didn't wear the same close and she wasn't also wearing tears. If someone told her that some years later she would not cry for him she would have laughed but it seemed surreal now. It even seemed logical not to. He was no longer the center of her universe. Was having him now what made her conclude this? Probably. Was she his new center? That was the mystery.

She slowly sat up thinking that if she could reenact maybe she would get her script right.

It didn't.

She pressed her eyes shut, forcing, begging the water to come out of her eyes. No amount of anything would make them break. She didn't know why but this felt more awful than the hollowness because it meant that he had died. And even though he was still alive she felt that way because it felt like she had just lost him. She wanted herself to need him but she couldn't and that was the reason she felt like he died. He was a beautiful part of her history maybe what she is today but he was no longer that meaningful. She didn't know why but he was no longer there.

"Sakura?" his voice resumed in the outside and it took her a few moments to realize that.

She turned to the sound. "I don't love you anymore."

His face fell for a second then he scratched the back of his head, smiling sheepishly. "Funny because you said you loved me before you left."

Her heart stopped and there was a ringing in her ear. "I-I didn't say anything. And you were awake?"

"Yeah," he said stepping forward and sitting next to her.

"But you had your eyes close." Even when she said it she knew she sounded stupid because he can always pretend. But it was perfectly understandable because she couldn't think straight when he had accuse her of something she didn't do and the fact that he didn't understand what she said before that and the consuming pressure she felt in her lungs.

"Yeah, but I wasn't sleeping. I will never sleep knowing you're that close."

Sakura knew he meant something different from what a bystander would understand if overhearing but she didn't felt like her, she felt like a bystander.

"Didn't you hear what I said?"

He sighed. "You don't mean it."

Sakura shook her head, catching his attention. "But I do." She felt nothing and she knew she meant it.

He turned to her, looking her in the eye like she had always wished. Getting his full interest for once. But yet again not like she wanted. "You don't understand. You're confused. You're contradicting yourself because you're _confused_-"

"Because I said 'I love you,'. I never did. And I don't, not anymore." She interrupted. "You don't understand."

He huffed as he leaned on the bench. "Why is it that you find problem in every solution?"

"There's still a problem," she shrieked insulted, "and we never found a solution. You're avoiding everything. You don't understand. You don't get it."

"What I don't get is _you_?" he said coolly though she could still hear the annoyance in his voice.

"You never have!" she stood. "You never wanted to and now in some way you're saying you did but that now you don't."

"You know what?" he narrowed his eyes. "I did. And she is not you."

"And you are not you!" she hated how she raised her voice because that caught attention and she knew people weren't aware their all time traitor was here. But then again did it matter. "You're not the person I create in my mind for years. And you never will be. Maybe for a few seconds yesterday you were but it took me does same seconds to realize it was all a fake. And maybe I'm a fake to you too. Maybe you created something you thought you knew but you don't. We actually don't know each other."

"Give me everything you are then," he suggested, still sitting down, but looking up, "make me know you."

"No…" she said losing her voice for the first time.

He shook his head as if she proved him right. "How do expect me to understand when you're not even trying?"

"I already gave you everything. Before you left on your wild goose chase I gave you everything I was to make know me and to make you stay. I gave you all my broken heart beats. What did you do? You broke them even more.

I might have not meant it yesterday but I mean it now, I don't love you anymore."

"Why?" this time his tone was demanding as he stood in front of her, so close the air around them seem circulate very slowly.

_And please don't stand so close to me_

_I'm having trouble breathing_

_I'm afraid of what you'll see right now_

_I give you everything I am_

_All my broken heart beats_

_Until I know you understand_

_And I will make sure to keep my distance_

_Say "I love you" when you're not listening_

_How long can we keep this up, up, up?_

"Why? Why? Why?" She repeated over and over as if it weren't more clearer. "Why can't you see that the answer is you?"

He stood there silent.

She continued, "I've wasted my time, my time- not yours because I bet that not until now was I running through your mind- thinking that you'd would come, that you would remember me and that you would return, to come back for me. To take me like I wanted. I kept and kept and- keep waiting.

And now that I have you here, I realize that you are not what I wanted because…. because….I realized time is more important and I waited my precious time in the likes of you. And I still am," she corrected, her voice cracking in a whisper with bitter disappointment. "But you- you keep waiting to save what we have."

He took on step closer and in a sweep movement reached for her neck and brought his lips to her and like that she saw it:

***** She realized that maybe what you want isn't what you need.

The sun was filtering through her glass window. A day had just begun and she wanted to leave, to have some space to breathe. To begin a dangerous pastime and truly think.

Sakura causally twisted in such so she could see him. His eyes were close and he was gently taking in air. So, he was actually sleeping. She sighed.

In one quick move she broke away from his arms and left him tangled in the bed.

He seemed peaceful as he laid there, like nothing could disturb him. And like that something clicked.

"I love you," she said because she knew that in that state he couldn't hear her. He couldn't listen. *********

_And I keep waiting_

_For you to take me_

_You keep waiting_

_To save what we have_

_So I'll make sure to keep my distance_

_Say "I love you" when you're not listening_

_How long can we keep this up, up, up?_

_Make sure to keep my distance_

_Say "I love you" when you're not listening_

_How long til we call this love, love, love?_


	4. Not the problem

Not the problem

(Song: Falling by Florence and the Machine)

Sakura quickly stepped back, exasperated.

She opened her mouth but not words came out, her jaw just fell and rose. She blinked instead, forcing herself to figure if what had just taken place was real or false. Real because she was trying to disentangle it's capability of it being true. False because only in her head had she kissed him before and yet it was this detail that won out the contest, making it real.

The hurt look in his eyes made her tempted in running back to him and making him feel better. But she couldn't. She didn't.

"I…" she managed when her tongue found the movement in creating syllables. "… have to go."

When she gave her back to him she didn't look back. He didn't come for her either. She didn't know whether to be relief or disappointed. Relief that he was, in some form, letting her go, giving her time to think, or disappointed that in some way he had proven her point. Either way it didn't held any case.

At first she started walking then jogging then running. Her feet constantly splashed poodles, residue from the previous storm. Though given this she didn't hear anything else. Her mind was blank. Her heart was blank. Everything in front of her was blank and she made herself stop once she realized that.

She was almost outside the village. She was gasping from the run. She was thirsty. She was tired. She was confused. But above all she wasn't sure.

She wasn't sure what was going on. She wasn't sure where she was. She wasn't sure who she was. She wasn't sure if she'd known all along. She wasn't sure if she knew who _he_ was. She wasn't sure if she'd known all along.

She just wasn't that sure.

There was this burning sensation in her chest which she quickly classified as a side effect from her sprint. She turned around on her heels and instead of stepping outside she headed towards the village, again. She wanted to get out of her sleeping clothes. She wanted to relax and not think at all. But she wouldn't return to her house, afraid she'll find Sasuke waiting for her.

So, when Naturo opened the door to his apartment did she realize she was standing at _his _apartment.

"Sakura?" he sounded more surprise than she was. "What are you doing here?"

Sakura smiled faintly, trying to disguise whatever she thought was missing about her. "I just stopped by to see how you were doing and all. You know? Because of the storm and everything."

Naruto raised one blond eyebrow. "In your pajamas?"

She frowned. "Well, if you want me to leave."

"No! No!" He pleaded as he grabbed her wrist. "I just thought it was weird. That's all. Come in."

Sakura sighed as she stepped inside his untidy apartment. He led her to a sofa, throwing everything upon in to the floor so she could sit. Mostly they were ramen cups, and most of them were empty.

"Can I get you something?" he offered as he looked around the apartment, appearing lost.

"No. It's fine."

"Are you sure?" he insisted as he started picking the cups he threw on the floor and other things, trying to clean a bit.

"Yeah. I just came to visit."

Naruto hmmmed letting her know that he heard as he continued cleaning. "So, how did you pass the storm? Sleep well?"

Sakura blinked hard, trying to remove the mental pictured she received by the mention of the prior night. Sakura swallowed. "Not that great but I'm here."

Naruto stopped, and looked at her for a moment. Scanning her every move. Then continued his work. "I can tell. I bet if you had a well-rested night you would have remembered to change clothes."

"Is it me wearing my pajamas that disorienting? You're wearing yours. And it's not like you haven't seen me before in mine." She argued remembering her missions with Naruto and they having to camp for the night.

"Yeah," he agreed slowly, "but I'd never seen you in your pajamas that exhausted."

Sakura automatically reached for her face, her fingers tracing pathways in the places she felt something oddly unfamiliar. "It's not that bad."

"Yeah, right." He replied sarcastically as he started picking things around the house. "If I didn't know any better I thought something happened to you and you just bolted here and since when I opened the door you were paper white pale I assumed it was bad."

Sakura swallowed again, grateful that he disappeared in another room so he wouldn't see how nervously racking she was. Instead of continuing with this conversation she decided to change it. "Don't you think it would be easier if you used a cloning jutsu to clean the use? I'd be much faster and more efficient."

Naruto's voice resumed in someplace else in the apartment. "I'd be more easy and very quick, trust me. But then it would be very difficult to keep this dialogue without me interrupting myself."

"You're right. You can be very annoying sometimes."

There was silence and Sakura might thought she had ruined the mood just when it'd became nonchalant, when he said. "Sakura?"

"Hmmm?"

"Why are you really here for?"

Her heart stopped and she tried very hard not to trip on her own voice. "I already told you."

"No," he said and out of nowhere he came walking in. "You just told me what I wanted to hear. You know very well that this is the last place you want to come to and frankly I won't either. But you would if it was your last resort, so tell me: Why are you really here for?"

Sakura immediately stood from where she was sitting, thinking that everything would be fine if she were here but instead here she was growing defensive. "So, now what? I can't even drop by for a visit without you thinking that there's a more darker sinister reasons for it."

"Yeah," the words quickly came out. "Though I bet if Sasuke were living with me I would have no doubt in why you would come. But he isn't and you're hiding something from me. Since you stepped inside."

Sakura felt as though she was punched in the face. She felt heavy and her head started to pulse with humiliation and embarrassment but despite that she felt heartrending. It surprised her that those words could come out of him, when all he ever did was try to make her feel welcome. She felt sick to her stomach and she wanted to run.

"Your right," she tried not spat, "I bet if he was here everything would be perfect. But it's not and it's not like it will be if he were. It isn't. But it's not like he left. There's a jerk standing in front of me too."

She started walking away. Trying very hard to find the door through her fury.

"Sakura, I didn't mean-"

She snapped around. "You did. You meant every word."

"Because you're not telling me what's going on."

"I came here to find comfort and maybe if I had it in me, I'd tell you what was going on." Even though she knew she wouldn't. "But- but you ruined it."

"I was just trying to help."

"I don't need your help!"

"If you didn't, than why would you ever come here?" he asked her calmly. "To get a few laughs? To pass the time? To pretend or think I didn't notice that something was wrong? You came here because you thought I could help but you're not if you won't let me."

"You wouldn't understand." Her voice was small once she realized he was right. Maybe she didn't notice at the moment but she did now. In some way hadn't she always come to him with her troubles, hadn't she always thought he held the solutions to all her problems, didn't she came to him when Sasuke left? Guess she thought he could fix anything. Maybe he could.

"I won't if you don't let me understand." He kept with his calm voice, figuring that it was the only way to cool her down.

"Falling." She said. "Falling is not the problem. When I'm falling I'm at peace."

"Yes?" he was confused. "Then what's the problem?"

"When I hit the ground."

"When you hit the ground?" He still didn't understand, only what she feared.

"It's only when I hit the ground that caused all the grief." She turned her head around, opened the door and walked out. He didn't follow.

**A/N: I didn't put the lyrics in here so it wouldn't be that predictable. That. But please tell me what you guys think**


	5. She's on your mind

**She's on your mind**

(Song: Over my head by The Fray)

He felt a sinking feeling.

And for the first time in his life he thought of the possibility that this was what Sakura felt when he left, when he betrayed her, what she was talking about minutes ago. He wanted to go after her but some gravitational pull made him stay where he was. And for the first time in his life he knew it wasn't pride.

If it was pride he would have chased after her and contorted her and obligated her to tell him what it was she was running away from. If he wasn't man enough for her at that. But he didn't because he wasn't man enough, if he was he wouldn't have treated her the way he did over the years. And knowing this made him halt, hesitate.

If she wanted to go, then she could. He couldn't stop her; he held no authority over her. But he was also letting her go because he knew she could do better. She could find someone worth living for. Instead of him, instead of dying for because he knew that there was no doubt in her head that she would risk her life for his. Hadn't she done it before?

Nevertheless, he couldn't look back. If she didn't, there was no reason from him to do the same. Regardless he still watched her run and couldn't help think that she was because he was a monster. Needless to say he was.

When she was nowhere to be found in the poor visibility the horizon held, he decided to sit down once he realized his legs couldn't hold him any longer. He sighed, his breathe wobbling with dissatisfaction. He rubbed his face and eyes repeatedly, begging his brain to turn back time or to transport him to another planet. He could say he was over his head in that moment.

He tried very hard to remember why he was even there for. Why had he returned for her? Why had he even bothered? Why had he thought she would have no problem with this?

It was this hollowness, this thing in his mind that told him he had not finished what he started, what he didn't know was that he never had commence it to begin with. It was this disturbance that no matter what, everything was going to be okay, that there was a happy ending in all of this. There was always happiness in the end. He was reminded that only in fairytales where these unreasonable things originated. This was real life. And despite what happened he would have never in a millions years had expected her to back off.

He guessed that for her sake she wasn't that weak, senseless girl he knew. The girl that would have thrown herself in front of him before anything happened. The girl that he secretly understated as a bit appreciated. But she was gone, replace by this… new person that without really knowing her he missed her already.

He rubbed his eyes again, giving up to the thought of him waking up to a different set of circumstances. He let his arms fall to his lap. He looked around. Everything was quiet. Like everything in this village was empty.

He was sitting there about half an hour expecting her to pop out of nowhere. He didn't know why but since she told him she loves him he anticipated her everywhere. Guess he should have listened to her when she said she didn't love him anymore. But the thing was… he didn't want to believe it, like he didn't want to believe she was a different person.

He just couldn't give up. Give up.

Sasuke immediately stood up.

Within seconds there was a throbbing ache at his face from where Naruto hit his mark. It took him a moment to realize what had happened. There were lights in his eyes and he wanted very badly to sit down and drown in self pity.

Sasuke had been standing a minute ago in front of Naruto's house once he figured he was the only one that held his answers. He was the one who had years of experience with Sakura. He was the one who knows her instead of knew. What he hadn't expected was him throwing a punch just as he was opening the door. Well, he expected a reaction but this wasn't it. In his mind he always thought Naruto had wasted his years looking, waiting for him to come back. That he was somehow peaceful. Another thing he was wrong about, another person he didn't know anymore.

In the frenzy of what had taken place Sasuke slung a shot back to Naruto. Hitting bull's-eye in Naruto's right eye. If he couldn't handle him there than so wouldn't Sasuke. They started swinging their fits blindly around.

The instant the pain started Sasuke knew where the brutality had hit him. His abdomen, his face again, his mouth, his head, his leg. He also had his way too. Naruto's stomach, shoulder, chest, arm, the same eye again.

"Stop!" finally came from Naruto once he was on top of Sasuke, his hands securely around his neck, pinning him down to the ground.

"You-" Sasuke barely choked. "-started!"

"No, no, no!" Naruto's voice dripped of sarcasm as his fingers tighten their hold. "No, you did when you knocked that door. What the hell are you doing here?"

"I…" Sasuke couldn't finish and he knew that it wasn't the edges of his eyes turning black from a possible blackout that stopped him.

"Well?" Naruto pressed harder, but once he realized what he was actually doing let go and flinched his way to a stand. "What the hell are you even doing here? Now? What's your problem?"

"I… it's none of your business." He couldn't admit it to Naruto, not when he had turned a shade of red just like him, just like when they mentioned her. In fact he wouldn't have ever thought they had the slightest thing in common.

"It is if you come to my village and when you go personally to me."

"Look at you," he started to insult, trying to avoid his recent embarrassment, "you're not even hokage and you're acting like you run the whole damn village."

"At least I'm man enough to think of someone else but me."

That hit was more precise than any punch thrown in that instant. He tried not to blush again. If he only knew Sasuke wasn't there for himself.

"Well…"

"Well…? What?" Naruto said instead, almost screaming. "You better tell me because I'm gonna kick you out so hard you'd wished you'd be dead. Then we'll see who the bigger man is."

"I…" he couldn't believe what he was doing. "I came here for a small advice."

Naruto's face fell, shockingly. "What? You mean to tell me you came here for…advice? No mortal battle, no threats, no killing… just advice."

Surprisingly getting hit yet again by Naruto was more shocking than him hitting the first time or asking for advice in the first place.

"Go to hell, if you think I'm going to believe that bullshit."

"But I'm not." Sasuke spat blood, staggering on the floor.

"How the hell do you expect me to give you advise when all my life that's what I've been trying to do?" Sasuke didn't meet Naruto's eye and this seem to deflate his anger a bit.

Though regardless of everything that just happened he didn't expect a welcoming hand, offering to help. "I just hope that for your sake it's worth it…"

Sasuke didn't know what to do in that moment. He was sore and out of reason. So, he just went with it. He took his hand.

"Believe me, it is."

Naruto pulled him up. "Does this mean you changed leagues?"

By nighttime everything just seemed to have fallen asleep, with a light weighted rain falling on everything. It all was quiet like this morning and all he had in mind was relaxing and breathing. But it was impossible in that moment. He couldn't.

"_She's on your mind." Naruto had said, his eyes wondering emptily on the floor._

He couldn't have been more precise.

"_Crazy, right?" Sasuke said, feeling the need to keep the mood light for some reason. _

"_I always known this would happen. It would explain why she was here this morning." _

"_She was here this morning…?"_

"_Yeah," his answer was echoing with some remorse. "I knew she wasn't here for me. For whatever she does there's a secrete motive, or a set of circumstances revolving you. It always been."_

_Sasuke opened his mouth not sure what he wanted to say but he didn't have a chance to do it either. Naruto snapped his gaze to him. "Just promise me you won't hurt her. She was devastated when left but she would be more devastated if you stayed…for good… Just promise, okay?" _

In that moment he had forgotten that Naruto was in love with her. How could he forget that? It wasn't like he had a choice either.

"_I promise," he assured. _

There was this creaking sound from the door opening, the kind you get when you are sneaking out or sneaking in. And by impulse he was immediately on his feet.

"Sakura?" he said as soon as she took a corner and was visible for him to see.

She was still on her sleeping clothes. Was she like that all day? Her face turned pale as soon as she made eye contact with him. She was ready to bolt the same direction she had come from. When she realized there was no time and there was no exit her eyes searched the floors, as if it held the answer to something. If avoiding him was a legitimate excuse than it was.

"I am," he tried to say without stumbling with his own words but when she didn't look up it was inevitable, "losing you- right now."

Her gaze shot up as he finished this.

"And you're making this effortless."

"You," she interrupted, "did the same to me. And it was easy for you, almost natural."

"Why do you always go back to the past?" he asked calmly.

"Because your part of it. It's the part that doesn't last and I am yours too. So, don't try to sweet talk yourself out off anything like the last years of my life didn't happen."

"I know that I can't take it back but I wish I could."

"Life doesn't run on wishes, Sasuke, believe me I tried so hard to do it too." Her voice was un-victorious. "You just learn to move on."

"_She hasn't moved on," Naruto had said, "she might swear or act like it but she hasn't. She just thinks she has." _

"Have you moved on, Sakura?" he asked.

"Yes," her reply came quick as she held her head high.

"I haven't." he admitted.

"Since when?" she asked insulted. "Since three days ago?"

"Since a long time."

"Trust me that is not as long as me." Her tone was pure bitterness.

"So, you admit you haven't moved on either?"

As he quickly said it, he quickly regretted. Her eyes filled with tears, and she immediately went searching for whatever she lost on the floor. Her shoulders shook and her face crumbled in a sob.

"You don't know how it has been for me. And you're not even close to finding out. Don't try to either." Sasuke tried to approach her but she started to scream. "Get away!"

"I'm just trying to help."

"You're not. You're making it worse."

"Can't you get that all I want his you," his voice started to rise.

"What I don't get is what you're doing here?" she retorted

"I'm here for you!"

"Once you realized you're life was a pathetic mess with pathetic people who have waited for you until now!" she added

"I know that you have waited for me but now that I'm here what am stopping you now?" He tried to reach closer and he was surprise when she didn't back down. He had his hand on her shoulder and when she looked up his heart stopped for a moment.

"What's stopping me now is reason. The reasoning in my head that tells me that if you hurt me once you'll hurt me again. And frankly I'd rather suffer at my own cost that of your own."

"I… I don't know what to say." He admitted.

"_Say that you won't ever go," Naruto had said, "that you will always stay."_

"Just say you'll leave," she offered.

"No." he was still blinking. "I just … never thought you wanted to bring it down."

"It had always been down."

He was snapped back to reality. "I promise… I won't ever go," she was staring at him closely. "I will always stay."

"What?" she said.

"Let's build this back together." He cleared. "Or tore it up ourselves."

"Or end it."

"_Don't end it," Naruto had said, "don't give in or give up, just yet."_

"Why don't we start at the end?"

"You're not making sense." She said confused.

"If we start at the end wouldn't we begin with a happy start."

"Why would it ever be happy? Why would anything be happy?"

"Because everything has a happy ending and I rather start at the end." He said even if he was contradicting himself. He just couldn't give up.

The end….

**A/n: So yeah, I don't know what to do anymore. My sis helped at the end… it's just, I don't know what it is with Sasuke I just… hate him but I love the couple so yeah…**

**So I ended the story, please review ;) **


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